While you'd think this is finally a blog entry concerning my weight loss, considering it is a weight-loss blog, you'll be sad to find that this is yet another entry concerning my personal life, outside the bariatric world.
Today is my ex-boyfriend's birthday. Haha. While I could write a novel about the should-have-dones, could-have-dones and what-went-wrongs, this is more about me than him. When I met, hmmm, let's call him "Craig", I was 14. A spring chicken. We met at a mutual friends birthday party, and were inseperable basically until the time we started haivng issues. Those came and went as we were in a long-distance relationship and things weren't easy for a 14 year old and a 16 year old to make things work without self-reliance or independence. Or a driver's license. But damn it, if we didn't try.
At that time in my life, I was having these deep, dark issues concerning parents, and acceptance, and moving, and self-esteem. Craig was the answer to all of it, at least in my 14 year old mind. I kissed the ground he tread on, I worshipped him as a god, and I put aside everyone else in my life in a moment's notice if I knew he was going to call. As one might predict, it caused some major riffs between my mother and I. She thought he was mentally unstable, I thought he was sensitive. She thought he expected too much of me, I saw it as stepping my game up for the preparation of marrying him (!). How dumb I was, looking back.
11 months came and went and we found ourselves broken up, and our hearts on the mend. Along the way, I met some other unsavory characters, did some even more unsavory things, and before I knew it, I was 17 years old, and going out on my first date with my future husband.
I suppose what I'm getting at here, is that I feel like I've came a long way since then. While it is obvious that the age difference between 14 and 21 years is substantial in the way a young woman matures, I feel like I can look back on it all with a smile. He and I are still friends, chatting here and there on Facebook, and I have dealt with, and moved on from something tremendous in my adolescent years. I'm married, I'm happy, I'm a full-time student. I've had major surgery, and my heart is on the mend from years of self-torment. I am calmer, and more collected. I take major problems in stride and deal with them as they come, rather than agonizing every little detail like I used to.
It's amazing, really, how much I really have changed. I certainly hope Craig would agree.
Tuesday, September 6, 2011
Saturday, August 13, 2011
Love Remains the Same
It seems like every time I try to blog about current events, I'm swept up with how much there is to write. I guess I'll start off small. Hmmm, insignificant things that've happened here lately...
The husband and I got this truly amazing piece of software a few days ago. It is a desktop reminder that brings up a window on your screen every day and tells you what is due, or what needs to be done today and at what time, if applicable. It is really revolutionary for me. I spend so many hours on the computer paying bills, writing essays, and other school crap that I forget that Tuesday evenings I need to take the trash out, and Wednesday mornings I need to change the kitty litter.
Which brings me to my next interesting procurement. About a week or so ago, someone dumped a beautiful little tuxedo kitten off at my church. As soon as I saw it, I knew we had to take it home. Even with black fur on the sides, you could see its little ribs, and it was so tired from the sun, that it just laid right on the back stoop behind the church, not even bothered by the heavy foot traffic the kids out back were providing. Now, a week or so later, Shelby is a well-adjusted, and very well-fed kitten free of fleas and heat exhaustion. She's a bit of a handful, as most kittens are, but she's learning quickly and is eager to please when we pull the canned tuna out for a treat.
Some other things that are coming to mind so far, is just how great this weekend is going to be. Last night, the hubby and I stayed up waaay past our bedtimes and watched for the meteor shower that was at its peak in the NE. The problem was the moon. I don't think I've ever seen the moon that bright in my life. I blame that wholly for us not being able to catch the shower, but truly, the moon was the star of the evening. It was so bright, that it lit up the entire area where we live: on a small foothill, surrounded by fields, and tucked inside a little chain of mountains (or for you who are picky, much larger foothills). The whole place was illuminated. As a matter of fact, for sake of comparison, there are only two street lights in our area. One it is tucked far behind my house, at Chase's cousin's cabin, and the other, straight across the road at his aunt's house. The one across the road is nearly burned out, and casts a very deep, amber glow just 10 feet or so around the perimeter of her home. The light from the moon, however, drowned out the golden glow with this fantastic white-silver light that you could (literally!) see for a country mile. It was incredible.
That brings us to today. Chase and I are due to drop off some library books in London this afternoon, and were paid to pick up some oil paint in Richmond, and when I proposed this to my mother, I suggested that we maybe hit some antique shops in Berea along the way. She's actually coming with us, which is a miracle in and of itself. I can never tear her away from the things that she needs to take care of at home, so a day out with mommy is a one in a million opportunity.
I guess I'll end this now, and update when the weekend is over. You know, for the sake of some damage control, and maybe even explain why I titled this something completely irrelevant to the blog. :)
The husband and I got this truly amazing piece of software a few days ago. It is a desktop reminder that brings up a window on your screen every day and tells you what is due, or what needs to be done today and at what time, if applicable. It is really revolutionary for me. I spend so many hours on the computer paying bills, writing essays, and other school crap that I forget that Tuesday evenings I need to take the trash out, and Wednesday mornings I need to change the kitty litter.
Which brings me to my next interesting procurement. About a week or so ago, someone dumped a beautiful little tuxedo kitten off at my church. As soon as I saw it, I knew we had to take it home. Even with black fur on the sides, you could see its little ribs, and it was so tired from the sun, that it just laid right on the back stoop behind the church, not even bothered by the heavy foot traffic the kids out back were providing. Now, a week or so later, Shelby is a well-adjusted, and very well-fed kitten free of fleas and heat exhaustion. She's a bit of a handful, as most kittens are, but she's learning quickly and is eager to please when we pull the canned tuna out for a treat.
Some other things that are coming to mind so far, is just how great this weekend is going to be. Last night, the hubby and I stayed up waaay past our bedtimes and watched for the meteor shower that was at its peak in the NE. The problem was the moon. I don't think I've ever seen the moon that bright in my life. I blame that wholly for us not being able to catch the shower, but truly, the moon was the star of the evening. It was so bright, that it lit up the entire area where we live: on a small foothill, surrounded by fields, and tucked inside a little chain of mountains (or for you who are picky, much larger foothills). The whole place was illuminated. As a matter of fact, for sake of comparison, there are only two street lights in our area. One it is tucked far behind my house, at Chase's cousin's cabin, and the other, straight across the road at his aunt's house. The one across the road is nearly burned out, and casts a very deep, amber glow just 10 feet or so around the perimeter of her home. The light from the moon, however, drowned out the golden glow with this fantastic white-silver light that you could (literally!) see for a country mile. It was incredible.
That brings us to today. Chase and I are due to drop off some library books in London this afternoon, and were paid to pick up some oil paint in Richmond, and when I proposed this to my mother, I suggested that we maybe hit some antique shops in Berea along the way. She's actually coming with us, which is a miracle in and of itself. I can never tear her away from the things that she needs to take care of at home, so a day out with mommy is a one in a million opportunity.
I guess I'll end this now, and update when the weekend is over. You know, for the sake of some damage control, and maybe even explain why I titled this something completely irrelevant to the blog. :)
Saturday, July 9, 2011
Small Break
July has proved to be just as crazy as promised. I'm currently home, as my family is being photographed tomorrow and needed me to be in town. My class is moving much faster than I expected, and I truthfully should be working on a paper rather than this blog entry. But that's life. I have an appointment at the Center for Weight-Loss Surgery on Monday to have my band filled some more, and while I dread it, I'm excited to see how much more restriction I can have. I think here towards the 12 weeks, my restriction has loosened and I've been able to eat more than I really want...so this is a step in the right direction, no matter how painful.
As always, I'll update more as interesting things happen. :)
As always, I'll update more as interesting things happen. :)
Thursday, June 23, 2011
July Craziness
It seems to be a regular thing lately that I'm deviating from the purpose of this blog. This entry is no exception.
As of a few weeks ago, I signed up for summer classes at my little college in Barbourville. Turns out that I'm a bit behind from taking the semester off to have this surgery done, so I'm making up for lost time. I'm enrolled in an Intro to Critical Studies course that meets 4 days out of the week, so that means in order to save some money, Chase and I are going to set up camp for the month of July. Our prior plans consisted of us living out of our tent for the entire month, but since these crazy, sporadic storms have hit eastern Kentucky, we have since changed our living arrangements. We seriously happened upon this with fair fortune, however, in that Chase's uncle has so graciously offered us temporary use of his travel trailer to live in. So as of a few weeks from now, we will be residing in Barbourville for the entire month of July. I'm still pretty bummed about not being able to spend my summer living out of a tent, though.
In other news, I purchased Jillian Michael's 30 Day Shred. Still gathering the gumption to actually try it out. I also just found out that we have a copy of P90X lying around. Apparently the in-laws accidentally purchased a duplicate copy and forgot to tell us that they wanted us to have the extra. Oops. More exercise for me, though. Yay. As far as physical activity, I have found something that works for me besides lying around all day. :) I'm strength training 3 days/week, typically Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays, I'm doing cardio 5 days/week, and to round it out, I'm doing yoga on the weekends. Its making me stronger every time I do it. I'm in terrible need of a band fill, but I refused one the last time because I wasn't prepared for the pain. It really hurt so much the first time that I didn't want to do it again.
But back to the Barbourville living arrangements, there is also a nice little track with exercise equipment around it, in addition to a neat little water park. I'm very much looking forward to it all.
Well, I'm off to eat some dinner. :)
As of a few weeks ago, I signed up for summer classes at my little college in Barbourville. Turns out that I'm a bit behind from taking the semester off to have this surgery done, so I'm making up for lost time. I'm enrolled in an Intro to Critical Studies course that meets 4 days out of the week, so that means in order to save some money, Chase and I are going to set up camp for the month of July. Our prior plans consisted of us living out of our tent for the entire month, but since these crazy, sporadic storms have hit eastern Kentucky, we have since changed our living arrangements. We seriously happened upon this with fair fortune, however, in that Chase's uncle has so graciously offered us temporary use of his travel trailer to live in. So as of a few weeks from now, we will be residing in Barbourville for the entire month of July. I'm still pretty bummed about not being able to spend my summer living out of a tent, though.
In other news, I purchased Jillian Michael's 30 Day Shred. Still gathering the gumption to actually try it out. I also just found out that we have a copy of P90X lying around. Apparently the in-laws accidentally purchased a duplicate copy and forgot to tell us that they wanted us to have the extra. Oops. More exercise for me, though. Yay. As far as physical activity, I have found something that works for me besides lying around all day. :) I'm strength training 3 days/week, typically Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays, I'm doing cardio 5 days/week, and to round it out, I'm doing yoga on the weekends. Its making me stronger every time I do it. I'm in terrible need of a band fill, but I refused one the last time because I wasn't prepared for the pain. It really hurt so much the first time that I didn't want to do it again.
But back to the Barbourville living arrangements, there is also a nice little track with exercise equipment around it, in addition to a neat little water park. I'm very much looking forward to it all.
Well, I'm off to eat some dinner. :)
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
The Magic Continues...Literally!
Look at me, blogging twice in 8 hours time. Don't you feel special?
Today was another one of those blissful, happy days. The ones that make you feel infinite, remember? Our first stop this morning was a local attraction called MagiQuest. For those who are into LARP, or just RPGs in general, Harry Potter, or those with kids, or are kids at heart (that basically includes everyone I know...), GO TO THIS.
GO. TO. THIS. You will not be disappointed.
Its incredible. It is pricey, yes, but the feeling you get when you know that you're doing something that resembles magic...its just plain ol' COOL. The hubby and I ate at the Mellow Mushroom again this afternoon, and I gotta tell you, it just keeps getting better. Their hummus is to die for. Ahhh.
Later on in the afternoon, we made a pit stop at a scrapbooking supply store, and spent $18.00 on supplies that will probably round out the current project I'm working on. (Hmm, between vacation, weight-loss surgery, remodeling my house, summer classes, and scrapbooking, it seems like I've got my hand in just about everything. See why I blog so little? And I don't even have KIDS yet!) Okay, so that's not an excuse. It takes me all of 20 minutes to bang out an entry. I promise I'll get better.
But anywho. Later on this afternoon/early evening, we stopped at a nice, quiet little hookah shop and chatted with the workers, who were TOTALLY sweet and nice. Reason why I say this is because while we were shopping, this monsoon-like storm hit Pigeon Forge out of nowhere. One second we were looking at vaporizers and water-pipes, the next we were staring in slack-jawed horror at the murky sky littered with dark gray funnel clouds. It was insane. We were going to leave the shop and head to the campground PDQ, but couldn't open the store's door due to high-winds. We ended up hanging in that store for an hour or more.
Well, here I am, safe and sound sitting in the RV, soaking up the sounds of nature. Rain pitter-pattering on the roof, water dripping down the windshield, and my lovely love sitting beside me patiently awaiting my attention so we can have a little RPG action. We're playing a campaign of Risus :The Anthing RPG tonight.
I hope all of you are well, and living incredible lives. Even if you just started today.
Today was another one of those blissful, happy days. The ones that make you feel infinite, remember? Our first stop this morning was a local attraction called MagiQuest. For those who are into LARP, or just RPGs in general, Harry Potter, or those with kids, or are kids at heart (that basically includes everyone I know...), GO TO THIS.
GO. TO. THIS. You will not be disappointed.
Its incredible. It is pricey, yes, but the feeling you get when you know that you're doing something that resembles magic...its just plain ol' COOL. The hubby and I ate at the Mellow Mushroom again this afternoon, and I gotta tell you, it just keeps getting better. Their hummus is to die for. Ahhh.
Later on in the afternoon, we made a pit stop at a scrapbooking supply store, and spent $18.00 on supplies that will probably round out the current project I'm working on. (Hmm, between vacation, weight-loss surgery, remodeling my house, summer classes, and scrapbooking, it seems like I've got my hand in just about everything. See why I blog so little? And I don't even have KIDS yet!) Okay, so that's not an excuse. It takes me all of 20 minutes to bang out an entry. I promise I'll get better.
But anywho. Later on this afternoon/early evening, we stopped at a nice, quiet little hookah shop and chatted with the workers, who were TOTALLY sweet and nice. Reason why I say this is because while we were shopping, this monsoon-like storm hit Pigeon Forge out of nowhere. One second we were looking at vaporizers and water-pipes, the next we were staring in slack-jawed horror at the murky sky littered with dark gray funnel clouds. It was insane. We were going to leave the shop and head to the campground PDQ, but couldn't open the store's door due to high-winds. We ended up hanging in that store for an hour or more.
Well, here I am, safe and sound sitting in the RV, soaking up the sounds of nature. Rain pitter-pattering on the roof, water dripping down the windshield, and my lovely love sitting beside me patiently awaiting my attention so we can have a little RPG action. We're playing a campaign of Risus :The Anthing RPG tonight.
I hope all of you are well, and living incredible lives. Even if you just started today.
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
Life Less Ordinary
Okay, so I know that things have been slow on here, but my life has went from placid to HECTIC in a month's time. I'm currently in Wears Valley, TN, on vacation, and soaking up my weight-loss success. I was bad today, though, and splurged on a couple small slices of pizza for lunch. But never fear, I had a salad for dinner, and a handful of strawberries for dessert to help me get that "healthy food" taste back in my mouth. :D
I've currently lost 27 lbs. My face is thinner, my knees are stronger, and my self-esteem is growing. Today, over lunch, my husband and I were casually chatting about how normal we feel when we are in this area. We honeymooned here, and since then, this place has been...well, magical. Even with our crazy busy life, when we drive past that Sevier County sign, its like life and normalcy resumes for us. We laugh more, we kiss more, we hold hands more, and its almost as if we become our true selves, rather than this tough shell that we present as otherwise. We talked briefly of moving here eventually, and came to the agreement that once we both earn our desired credentials, that we would like to start looking for a place here to live. As sudden and brash as it all sounds, it was a common theme over the past few days that we would keep encountering this thought in our ever-growing conversations: life is not worth living if not lived to the fullest. Life is too short to live to garner other people's attention, affection, or approval. Your life is YOURS, and if you are not happy about something, figure out a way to change it.
While I am eternally grateful to the people that have made my life so easy for me and my husband, we want something more. We NEED something more than a ramshackle, 60 year old house with faulty wiring and linoleum flooring throughout. We need more than to live comfortably in a boring neighborhood that offers NO excitement other than seeing my in-laws DAILY. We need a place that we can be free to giggle like little kids and share an ice cream cone without having to drive an hour to get one.
We deserve to be happy in a place that makes us feel infinite.
Rambling, I know. I'm just excited and hopeful, and ready to get on with my extraordinary life.
...Live a life less ordinary. Live a life extraordinary with me...
I've currently lost 27 lbs. My face is thinner, my knees are stronger, and my self-esteem is growing. Today, over lunch, my husband and I were casually chatting about how normal we feel when we are in this area. We honeymooned here, and since then, this place has been...well, magical. Even with our crazy busy life, when we drive past that Sevier County sign, its like life and normalcy resumes for us. We laugh more, we kiss more, we hold hands more, and its almost as if we become our true selves, rather than this tough shell that we present as otherwise. We talked briefly of moving here eventually, and came to the agreement that once we both earn our desired credentials, that we would like to start looking for a place here to live. As sudden and brash as it all sounds, it was a common theme over the past few days that we would keep encountering this thought in our ever-growing conversations: life is not worth living if not lived to the fullest. Life is too short to live to garner other people's attention, affection, or approval. Your life is YOURS, and if you are not happy about something, figure out a way to change it.
While I am eternally grateful to the people that have made my life so easy for me and my husband, we want something more. We NEED something more than a ramshackle, 60 year old house with faulty wiring and linoleum flooring throughout. We need more than to live comfortably in a boring neighborhood that offers NO excitement other than seeing my in-laws DAILY. We need a place that we can be free to giggle like little kids and share an ice cream cone without having to drive an hour to get one.
We deserve to be happy in a place that makes us feel infinite.
Rambling, I know. I'm just excited and hopeful, and ready to get on with my extraordinary life.
...Live a life less ordinary. Live a life extraordinary with me...
Friday, May 27, 2011
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
Some Good News, Finally!
It seems, after rereading prior entries, that I'm just complaining. That's not what I wanted this blog to turn out as, so I'm changing it. The layout, the tone of my entries...everything. I'm really not that negative of a person, so I really, truly apologize for my non-stop complaining. Things just haven't really been very easy the past few weeks, but it seems like they're all straightening themselves up. So that's good.
I got some great news last week, so I feel like this is an excellent place to begin my more upbeat, happy updates. I had an appointment to have my BCP refilled, and while I was there, found that I am now at259 257 lbs. I have not seen the 250's since my first year of marriage. That means that I've lost enough weight that I can now ride roller coasters again. Looks like I'll be planning a weekend vacay in Florida this fall so I can go to The Wizarding World of Harry Potter. I've been on the edge of my seat since I've heard they were building it. I guess I should also make an aside saying that I'm a Harry Potter fangirl. It's sad, really. It breaks my heart that the last bit of the series franchise is coming to a close in July. Its like the death of my childhood. As soon as the end credits start rolling, I'm no longer a kid anymore. Sigh.
But, to wrap this completely-off-topic blog up, I'm steadily gaining my life back. I'm falling back into my routine, and things are really looking up. I'm regaining my interests and hobbies, I'm reading more, I'm walking more, and most importantly, I'm smiling more. :)
I got some great news last week, so I feel like this is an excellent place to begin my more upbeat, happy updates. I had an appointment to have my BCP refilled, and while I was there, found that I am now at
But, to wrap this completely-off-topic blog up, I'm steadily gaining my life back. I'm falling back into my routine, and things are really looking up. I'm regaining my interests and hobbies, I'm reading more, I'm walking more, and most importantly, I'm smiling more. :)
Sunday, April 24, 2011
Easter 2011
Just wishing my readers a very happy Easter. I hope all of you are thriving and wonderful.
Monday, April 18, 2011
My First Band Fill, or alternately, Ouch! That REALLY F!@#$%^ Hurts!
Today marks my second follow-up visit with St. Joseph East. I'll give you a brief run-down of the whole day.
Trip to Lexington, met with surgeon, had labs drawn and had my first band fill.
I hope to God that they aren't all like that.
However, I got to see myself x-rayed in real time, so it was almost like a live feed. Remember the cartoons of those x-ray slabs that someone steps in front of, and you can see only their pelvis? Kinda like that. I got to see my own heart beat, and that was cool. Then I got to drink nasty contrast fluid, and that was not cool. But then I got to see the fluid whoosh from my esophagus into my pouch, and then all was right with the world again. Very cool.
But ouch. I'll write later. :(
Trip to Lexington, met with surgeon, had labs drawn and had my first band fill.
I hope to God that they aren't all like that.
However, I got to see myself x-rayed in real time, so it was almost like a live feed. Remember the cartoons of those x-ray slabs that someone steps in front of, and you can see only their pelvis? Kinda like that. I got to see my own heart beat, and that was cool. Then I got to drink nasty contrast fluid, and that was not cool. But then I got to see the fluid whoosh from my esophagus into my pouch, and then all was right with the world again. Very cool.
But ouch. I'll write later. :(
Friday, April 15, 2011
Post Op - One Month
I'm a little frustrated this time around for the simple fact that the scale has stopped moving, and has decided to creep up 2 lbs.. I'm not even going to justify it by writing it in my weigh-loss box in the right-hand margin, because I know this is typical, but I have never wanted a saline injection (a fill up) directly to my stomach any worse than I do now. On Monday I return to Lexington to have my first fill, and from what I've heard, it leaves something to be desired. I'm just looking forward to the result. But all in all, I'm doing well. I'm eating all normal solid foods, and looking forward to CARBS again. I can't eat them for another 5 months. :(
One thing I'm going to complain a bit about in the post, however is my port site. It just flat-out HURTS. Not all the time - it's not a constant pain, but it makes me want to cry every time it does. If I sit a certain way, it hurts. If I sit for too long, it hurts. If I walk too much, it hurts. However, I can go and do the very same activities the next day, it doesn't hurt. It's very fickle. And frustrating. I have a feeling that its being this way because of the upper respiratory infection I had when I was recovering from the surgery. I was coughing so hard, and so productively that I think I may have literally ripped a stitch that attaches the port to my abdominal wall. Ouch.
But on that note, I think I'll leave it here. The battery in my laptop is nearly dead, and I'm needing some breakfast!
One thing I'm going to complain a bit about in the post, however is my port site. It just flat-out HURTS. Not all the time - it's not a constant pain, but it makes me want to cry every time it does. If I sit a certain way, it hurts. If I sit for too long, it hurts. If I walk too much, it hurts. However, I can go and do the very same activities the next day, it doesn't hurt. It's very fickle. And frustrating. I have a feeling that its being this way because of the upper respiratory infection I had when I was recovering from the surgery. I was coughing so hard, and so productively that I think I may have literally ripped a stitch that attaches the port to my abdominal wall. Ouch.
But on that note, I think I'll leave it here. The battery in my laptop is nearly dead, and I'm needing some breakfast!
Friday, April 1, 2011
Post Op - Day Fourteen!
Short update tonight...
Today was weigh in day, and I'm now weighing in at a grand total of 260. Wow. 16 lbs down in two weeks. Unreal. I've not lost weight like this since my freshman year in high school when I lived only on turkey breast sandwiches for an entire year (I lost 50 lbs that year and gained back 65...hmph). But I've not got time to type too much. Need to get an early start to bed. I've got a date with my hubby tomorrow, and I need to look my best. Beauty sleep for me. Life is just too good.
Today was weigh in day, and I'm now weighing in at a grand total of 260. Wow. 16 lbs down in two weeks. Unreal. I've not lost weight like this since my freshman year in high school when I lived only on turkey breast sandwiches for an entire year (I lost 50 lbs that year and gained back 65...hmph). But I've not got time to type too much. Need to get an early start to bed. I've got a date with my hubby tomorrow, and I need to look my best. Beauty sleep for me. Life is just too good.
Sunday, March 27, 2011
Post Op - Day Nine
Today I feel marvelous. I have been singing to myself, cooking, and dancing almost all day. It feels like I'm a love-sick Cinderella sweeping through the room, broom in hand. "...so this is love."
My first follow-up was Friday, and I'm 11 pounds lighter than I was before surgery. I had my surgical staples removed, and was wrangled into attending a support group meeting. Turns out my incisions are healing well, and were covered with medical tape. The attending Nurse Practitioner (who looks like Taylor Hicks!), gave me a clean bill of health and the go-ahead to try solid, non-pureed foods. The whole process was all very brief, and lasted around a couple hours.
The next day - yesterday for those keeping track, DH and I went shopping. I picked up some awesome new pieces for the summer, in a size or two too small so I have something to look forward to, and all told, walked a total of around 2 or 3 miles. When we arrived home, I realized that this is the first time I've not had knee pain after a day out in over a year.
I tried my first piece of solid food today, after church. An all-beef hotdog with a couple tablespoons of chili and a bit of mustard. With baby bites and chewing the living crap out of everything I put in my mouth (around 30 chews per bite), I got everything down, and kept it down. Allow me to break here and express my happiness that I have not vomited, spat up, became nauseous, or had any problems tolerating food since my band was placed. So...yay. But anyway...
Because of the combination of these things, I've just been really chipper all day. In addition, DH has been super attentive, grabbing my newly-developing waist and kissing me from behind, and surprising me with flowers. Very romantic. All in all, today has seemed like a kind of mundane fairy tale.
My first follow-up was Friday, and I'm 11 pounds lighter than I was before surgery. I had my surgical staples removed, and was wrangled into attending a support group meeting. Turns out my incisions are healing well, and were covered with medical tape. The attending Nurse Practitioner (who looks like Taylor Hicks!), gave me a clean bill of health and the go-ahead to try solid, non-pureed foods. The whole process was all very brief, and lasted around a couple hours.
The next day - yesterday for those keeping track, DH and I went shopping. I picked up some awesome new pieces for the summer, in a size or two too small so I have something to look forward to, and all told, walked a total of around 2 or 3 miles. When we arrived home, I realized that this is the first time I've not had knee pain after a day out in over a year.
I tried my first piece of solid food today, after church. An all-beef hotdog with a couple tablespoons of chili and a bit of mustard. With baby bites and chewing the living crap out of everything I put in my mouth (around 30 chews per bite), I got everything down, and kept it down. Allow me to break here and express my happiness that I have not vomited, spat up, became nauseous, or had any problems tolerating food since my band was placed. So...yay. But anyway...
Because of the combination of these things, I've just been really chipper all day. In addition, DH has been super attentive, grabbing my newly-developing waist and kissing me from behind, and surprising me with flowers. Very romantic. All in all, today has seemed like a kind of mundane fairy tale.
Monday, March 21, 2011
Post Op - Days Two and Three
I apologize for my absence yesterday, as my fever began to climb, and I became increasingly weak by the hour. Yesterday, was, in a word - rough. I woke up feeling pretty good. I found it easier to get up and down from sitting and lying down. I was able to get more fluid in my pouch, my fever was down a few points, and I slept better than I did the night before. I was even able to get up and walk to the end of my in-law's driveway. I began declining towards 4:00 on. I was growing increasingly weak and feverish. My old stomach was still catching up to my new pouch in the hunger department. I was pretty miserable. I also felt very dehydrated. I wasn't able to get in my 64oz. of fluids yesterday, and I certainly felt it. However, I was able to shower yesterday, and DH dressed my incisions (which I'll post pictures of later). They're painful, but healing. Incredibly itchy. And while we're on the topic of DH, he was able to visit an after-hours clinic for his sore throat. He tested positive for Strep. So there's two of us in the house feeling pretty under the weather.
But today, once again is a different story. I woke up feeling great. I was able to walk out of my driveway, all the way to my in-law's house. I sat on their front porch and chatted with my MIL while watching spring happen all around us. It is absolutely beautiful where I live. Daffodils, hyacinths, Magic Lillies. It's just magnificent, even looking out my front door is like a breath of fresh air. Winter has been so dull and dead that when we pulled up into the drive way the day after I left the hospital, I was shocked at how much color we have here in our little place in the mountains. Even with all the turmoil going on in the world - the riots, the new war in Libya, the gas prices, it all seems so far away from my mind right now. I feel totally at peace and calm.
On another note, today is the first day I begin my full liquids. For the past 5 days, I have been drinking only clear liquids, but today I've been able to partake of my protein supplements, and am able to tolerate them. Another milestone is done. Speaking of milestones, today I shocked myself. On my walk with DH, I was able to head down the stairs normally, instead of having to step down each step with one foot, and then another. It doesn't seem like much, but the pressure of the gas in my abdomen made stair climbing very difficult. When you undergo weight loss surgery, you find that little things become big milestones. Descending stairs was a big deal, so was walking the length of my in-law's 60 ft. driveway. It felt marvelous. I'm three days post-op and am already seeing weight loss. I feel like I'm on top of world. I'm learning it's a great thing to be on the losers bench.
But today, once again is a different story. I woke up feeling great. I was able to walk out of my driveway, all the way to my in-law's house. I sat on their front porch and chatted with my MIL while watching spring happen all around us. It is absolutely beautiful where I live. Daffodils, hyacinths, Magic Lillies. It's just magnificent, even looking out my front door is like a breath of fresh air. Winter has been so dull and dead that when we pulled up into the drive way the day after I left the hospital, I was shocked at how much color we have here in our little place in the mountains. Even with all the turmoil going on in the world - the riots, the new war in Libya, the gas prices, it all seems so far away from my mind right now. I feel totally at peace and calm.
On another note, today is the first day I begin my full liquids. For the past 5 days, I have been drinking only clear liquids, but today I've been able to partake of my protein supplements, and am able to tolerate them. Another milestone is done. Speaking of milestones, today I shocked myself. On my walk with DH, I was able to head down the stairs normally, instead of having to step down each step with one foot, and then another. It doesn't seem like much, but the pressure of the gas in my abdomen made stair climbing very difficult. When you undergo weight loss surgery, you find that little things become big milestones. Descending stairs was a big deal, so was walking the length of my in-law's 60 ft. driveway. It felt marvelous. I'm three days post-op and am already seeing weight loss. I feel like I'm on top of world. I'm learning it's a great thing to be on the losers bench.
Saturday, March 19, 2011
Post Op - Day One
It is finished. I suppose this is the point in which I tell you all the gruesome details, so here goes...
I'm fine. I'm pretty sore, but overall, I would rate my pain as 3 or 4. A bit more when I'm standing and walking. I'm still getting used to the type of pain involved, but it is totally manageable and I'm so relieved it is not worse. I'll start from the beginning.
I live 3 hours away from my hospital so my sister graciously housed me for a few days beforehand for my pre-op appointments. I arrived there on a Wednesday, my surgery was Friday. When I arrived, my stomach was turning in knots partly due to nerves, and partly due to the Devil's Drano, Milk of Magnesia. I was starving. I was close to gnawing my hand off before the operation. I was also on liquids two days prior to this. Understandable, right? When I arrived, I was placed in the pre-op "holding tank" where I got to meet my post-care nurse, and briefly speak with my surgeon again (who, by the way looks like a younger Steve Guttenburg). I also met my anesthesiologist (who looked quite a bit like Robert Irvine). And as an aside, my Nutrition Specialist looks like Amy Poehler. I was totally star struck throughout my whole experience. LOL.
I was hooked up to an IV, incorrectly at first, but then the situation was mended after some stern words with the nurse, and was given a dose of some relaxants. Wow, did that stuff work fast. Almost immediately, it felt as if I had taken 3 shots of tequila, and was ready to hit the floor. It certainly did not disappoint. I got to spend my last few minutes as a free woman with DH by my side, which improved the situation dramatically. I got one quick smooch in before I was whisked away into the operating room. The whole time, I was praying and praising God that this whole part of my life was over. As I was staring at the overhead fluorescent lights, I was in tears (happy tears, mind you) and my surgeon was concerned. I just whimpered "I'm so happy" and was out like a light. It may not sound like much, but it was a very moving experience. I still get a little weepy thinking about the new life I get to live. No more worries about digging my own grave with a knife and fork.
I woke up shortly after in a recovery room with the sweetest little nurse I've ever met. Surprisingly enough, as soon as I woke up, I was having coherent conversations with her, answering such questions as my name, what I'm in here for, my spouse's name, my surgeon's name. This is surprising because if one can recall, I had a rather unpleasant episode waking up from my EGD. The nurse was surprised as well, and remarked that it was the fastest that anyone has ever "came to" after being under General Anesthesia that she had ever seen. I was shortly moved into the outpatient room with a not-too-sweet nurse and to my surprise (the whole day was full of them, apparently) my hubby. I was asked to try to sit up, but the pain was so weird that I couldn't wrap my head around it. I was still a little foggy from the anesthesia, and couldn't do it. For those curious, the pain from the surgery was nothing compared to the problems I was having with my throat. There were so many different sensations of pain I didn't know what to do, so I just cried. I begged the nurse for more meds and analgesic throat spray. It's not that the pain from the surgery was severe, but so many different kinds was hard to take. To begin with, The discomfort from the incisions was there, layered on top was discomfort from the band around my stomach, layered on top of that was hunger pangs that I had no idea how to decipher. My newly formed pouch was full from the ice chips I had eaten in the recovery room, but my old stomach was growling like I hadn't eaten in weeks. The worst of it, though, was my throat. A few days before the surgery, DH so thoughtfully let me contract some of his chest congestion and sore throat. The sore throat was worse the morning of the surgery than it had been since I got it, and when I woke up and was able to talk, I sounded like an 80 year old with smokers cough. The pain in my throat was almost unbearable. I was in desperate need to swallow, but my mouth was so dry that when I did, my throat would stick together and make it worse. Even ice chips did nothing for me. It turns out, they placed a breathing tube down my throat to aide in oxygen saturation, and it aggravated the throat problem to a downright scary degree. In addition, I was having to cough up infected sputum while bracing my incisions from feeling like my intestines were going to pop out.
But that was yesterday. This morning, I awoke around 2:30 and was unable to get back to sleep. Turns out DH was awake as well and we then decided to book it back home where I could be miserable in my own bed. The trip down was a little scary, and the hubs was still pretty tired from not sleeping well, but we arrived safe and sound at about 6:30 this morning.
All in all, as the day progressed, my pain subsided. I'll begin here by telling everyone that the worst part about any kind of abdominal surgery is the O2 (or maybe it's Co2) they pump your stomach with to inflate it to have room to work. They can't remove all the gas, so it ends up settling in your shoulder, intestines, anywhere your body has a cavity. Next is walking and standing. To me, and I still haven't quite figured out the pain I'm feeling, it feels like gravity is pulling everything down around your lungs. For a while there, I was convinced that one of my lungs collapsed because I had such a hard time breathing. This is especially scary for because I'm a musician, and I pride myself with having an abnormally large lung capacity. But this too, goes away with walking and time.
I'm still finding it difficult to get up and down from a seated or lying position. Luckily, the hubby is here with me until Monday morning, which, by then, I should be able to handle. But the most remarkable thing so far? I've eaten 3 square meals of 4 oz of chicken broth, and I am FULL. I'm not having buyers remorse, I'm not craving food. I feel great. I feel alive. I feel more feminine. I'm no longer eating the same portions as my male partner.
This has been a nice release for me. Tomorrow, expect more. :)
I'm fine. I'm pretty sore, but overall, I would rate my pain as 3 or 4. A bit more when I'm standing and walking. I'm still getting used to the type of pain involved, but it is totally manageable and I'm so relieved it is not worse. I'll start from the beginning.
I live 3 hours away from my hospital so my sister graciously housed me for a few days beforehand for my pre-op appointments. I arrived there on a Wednesday, my surgery was Friday. When I arrived, my stomach was turning in knots partly due to nerves, and partly due to the Devil's Drano, Milk of Magnesia. I was starving. I was close to gnawing my hand off before the operation. I was also on liquids two days prior to this. Understandable, right? When I arrived, I was placed in the pre-op "holding tank" where I got to meet my post-care nurse, and briefly speak with my surgeon again (who, by the way looks like a younger Steve Guttenburg). I also met my anesthesiologist (who looked quite a bit like Robert Irvine). And as an aside, my Nutrition Specialist looks like Amy Poehler. I was totally star struck throughout my whole experience. LOL.
I was hooked up to an IV, incorrectly at first, but then the situation was mended after some stern words with the nurse, and was given a dose of some relaxants. Wow, did that stuff work fast. Almost immediately, it felt as if I had taken 3 shots of tequila, and was ready to hit the floor. It certainly did not disappoint. I got to spend my last few minutes as a free woman with DH by my side, which improved the situation dramatically. I got one quick smooch in before I was whisked away into the operating room. The whole time, I was praying and praising God that this whole part of my life was over. As I was staring at the overhead fluorescent lights, I was in tears (happy tears, mind you) and my surgeon was concerned. I just whimpered "I'm so happy" and was out like a light. It may not sound like much, but it was a very moving experience. I still get a little weepy thinking about the new life I get to live. No more worries about digging my own grave with a knife and fork.
I woke up shortly after in a recovery room with the sweetest little nurse I've ever met. Surprisingly enough, as soon as I woke up, I was having coherent conversations with her, answering such questions as my name, what I'm in here for, my spouse's name, my surgeon's name. This is surprising because if one can recall, I had a rather unpleasant episode waking up from my EGD. The nurse was surprised as well, and remarked that it was the fastest that anyone has ever "came to" after being under General Anesthesia that she had ever seen. I was shortly moved into the outpatient room with a not-too-sweet nurse and to my surprise (the whole day was full of them, apparently) my hubby. I was asked to try to sit up, but the pain was so weird that I couldn't wrap my head around it. I was still a little foggy from the anesthesia, and couldn't do it. For those curious, the pain from the surgery was nothing compared to the problems I was having with my throat. There were so many different sensations of pain I didn't know what to do, so I just cried. I begged the nurse for more meds and analgesic throat spray. It's not that the pain from the surgery was severe, but so many different kinds was hard to take. To begin with, The discomfort from the incisions was there, layered on top was discomfort from the band around my stomach, layered on top of that was hunger pangs that I had no idea how to decipher. My newly formed pouch was full from the ice chips I had eaten in the recovery room, but my old stomach was growling like I hadn't eaten in weeks. The worst of it, though, was my throat. A few days before the surgery, DH so thoughtfully let me contract some of his chest congestion and sore throat. The sore throat was worse the morning of the surgery than it had been since I got it, and when I woke up and was able to talk, I sounded like an 80 year old with smokers cough. The pain in my throat was almost unbearable. I was in desperate need to swallow, but my mouth was so dry that when I did, my throat would stick together and make it worse. Even ice chips did nothing for me. It turns out, they placed a breathing tube down my throat to aide in oxygen saturation, and it aggravated the throat problem to a downright scary degree. In addition, I was having to cough up infected sputum while bracing my incisions from feeling like my intestines were going to pop out.
But that was yesterday. This morning, I awoke around 2:30 and was unable to get back to sleep. Turns out DH was awake as well and we then decided to book it back home where I could be miserable in my own bed. The trip down was a little scary, and the hubs was still pretty tired from not sleeping well, but we arrived safe and sound at about 6:30 this morning.
All in all, as the day progressed, my pain subsided. I'll begin here by telling everyone that the worst part about any kind of abdominal surgery is the O2 (or maybe it's Co2) they pump your stomach with to inflate it to have room to work. They can't remove all the gas, so it ends up settling in your shoulder, intestines, anywhere your body has a cavity. Next is walking and standing. To me, and I still haven't quite figured out the pain I'm feeling, it feels like gravity is pulling everything down around your lungs. For a while there, I was convinced that one of my lungs collapsed because I had such a hard time breathing. This is especially scary for because I'm a musician, and I pride myself with having an abnormally large lung capacity. But this too, goes away with walking and time.
I'm still finding it difficult to get up and down from a seated or lying position. Luckily, the hubby is here with me until Monday morning, which, by then, I should be able to handle. But the most remarkable thing so far? I've eaten 3 square meals of 4 oz of chicken broth, and I am FULL. I'm not having buyers remorse, I'm not craving food. I feel great. I feel alive. I feel more feminine. I'm no longer eating the same portions as my male partner.
This has been a nice release for me. Tomorrow, expect more. :)
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
T-Minus 60 hours
Just wanted to let my little circle of readers know that I am scheduled to have my procedure done in four more days. I am currently fighting a nosebleed, so please excuse my brevity.
I'll update more as the time approaches.
I'll update more as the time approaches.
Thursday, January 27, 2011
Reboot...only not.
How do I even begin this? I guess with an apology to all four (!) of my followers. The last half a year or so has been one of the most trying times in my life. While it is entitled to a whole other blog entry entirely, I'll just quickly say that the past six months have been one of those life-changing periods of time for me. I feel like I have grown, shrunk, gained knowledge, and lost a lot along the way. I know none of this may seem coherent to the layperson, but I'm writing from the heart.
I guess I'll start from the beginning. It's been around 6 months or so since I've blogged. Wow! At this point in time, I should be hearing "How much have you lost?" followed by "You look incredible!" But none of that. I've not had the surgery. Due to some problems with my doctor's follow-up's and the non-support of said doctor, the surgery was a no go. I've since switched physicians, gone to my 6 month check-up's for medically supervised weight loss, and am currently having my information sent to my insurance company tomorrow morning. Even though it has been slow-going, its progress. Hopefully by this time next week, I'll be blogging about how I've scheduled my procedure, and the how, what, where and why. Again, hopefully.
But throughout this process of having the numerous doctor's appointments, I started a new semester at my third undergraduate school. Having said that, I'm lucky to be alive. I have never in my life done something so challenging. This school is entirely different from any other one I've been to. This school prides itself on being a "tough school" when in all reality, it's 90% busy work, and 10% mental capacity. However, I had the good fortune to be enrolled in a freshman-level Historic Religion course that absolutely ravaged every part of my brain. It is without a doubt, the most terrifyingly difficult class I have ever taken. I also worked my ass off to earn a final grade of 'B'...so I'm satisfied with that. Not my first choice, but still.
Along the way, I made some incredible new friends, began losing some old ones, and fell in love all over again with my best friend in this world. But that's another story. All in all, my little corner of the world has been fairly busy, but the only thing in life that is constant is change.
But there's more to come, and that's a good sign for now.
I guess I'll start from the beginning. It's been around 6 months or so since I've blogged. Wow! At this point in time, I should be hearing "How much have you lost?" followed by "You look incredible!" But none of that. I've not had the surgery. Due to some problems with my doctor's follow-up's and the non-support of said doctor, the surgery was a no go. I've since switched physicians, gone to my 6 month check-up's for medically supervised weight loss, and am currently having my information sent to my insurance company tomorrow morning. Even though it has been slow-going, its progress. Hopefully by this time next week, I'll be blogging about how I've scheduled my procedure, and the how, what, where and why. Again, hopefully.
But throughout this process of having the numerous doctor's appointments, I started a new semester at my third undergraduate school. Having said that, I'm lucky to be alive. I have never in my life done something so challenging. This school is entirely different from any other one I've been to. This school prides itself on being a "tough school" when in all reality, it's 90% busy work, and 10% mental capacity. However, I had the good fortune to be enrolled in a freshman-level Historic Religion course that absolutely ravaged every part of my brain. It is without a doubt, the most terrifyingly difficult class I have ever taken. I also worked my ass off to earn a final grade of 'B'...so I'm satisfied with that. Not my first choice, but still.
Along the way, I made some incredible new friends, began losing some old ones, and fell in love all over again with my best friend in this world. But that's another story. All in all, my little corner of the world has been fairly busy, but the only thing in life that is constant is change.
But there's more to come, and that's a good sign for now.
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