Friday Night Lights-Out

Firstly, I feel that it's appropriate to preface this with the notice that I am still pretty thoroughly medicated, so be not offended.

Secondly...YAY!!!

Today was my second round of testing and follow-up's at St. Joe's for the bariatric process.  First was the psychological review, then labs, followed lastly by an EKG and an EGD. What a day folks.  I've not seen this much action since, well, I dunno. My visit with the psychologist went smoothly, and he offered some great advice about talking to my DH about the repurcussions of a newly-skinny wife and our relationship, yadda yadda. Then onto the Nutritionist, who for all the world looks akin to Amy Poehler, who commended me on a 7 pound loss, and then lastly the Exercise Physiologist who told me nothing short of "keep up the good work."

Next was the labs portion, which I'm terribly impressed with.  From the minute I walked into the office, I neither had to sit down in the waiting room, nor experience the horror that is untrained phlebotomists. (I actually had labs yesterday too, at a different place, and I could swear that the woman dug so deep into my arm, I could swear she hit muscle.) As soon as I entered the room, I was out again in, literally, less than three minutes.  The woman was terribly efficient, made everything as painless as possible, and was very friendly and complimented my heinously protruding blue vein in my right inner-elbow, deeming it a "dandy."

The EGD and  EKG were the things I dreaded the most, when in all reality, was the least bothersome thing of the whole day.  I was called into the Endoscopy preparing station where I got to lay down and get comfy with an IV of fluid and a nice warm blanket, and my lovely DH to crack some jokes with before we got down to business. My anesthesiologist was a doll, refering to herself as my "cocktail waitress." As soon as I got my oxygen mask on, she told me that I would feel  a little woozy, and to just relax and swallow when she sprayed the Lanicane in my mouth (awful stuff, that is!) and before I knew it, I was waking up a half hour later talking to my nurse about what I'd like to drink after the procedure. Simple as anything I've ever done.

After the procedure, and gaining a little more strength back, we headed to a place with some amazing chicken wings, and ate some lunch, only to discover that I was craving some ice cream, like, hella-bad. So the we stopped at the local Baskin Robbins to get a cone.

This is where it gets interesting.

After the ice cream, I was really thirsty.  Luckily, I had a cup of tea left over from dinner the night before that was still good.  I took the lid off of it, only to discover a LOOGIE IN MY TEA.

Now I know that it wasn't me, nor DH that did it, so then I called my brother-in-law to see if he did it. (He moved my car so he could get out of the driveway this morning.) It wasn't him either. And just when I was stumped, thinking that no one else was in our car, it dawned on me that we had a free valet parking service take our car at the front of the building. At this discovery, I was livid. I demanded DH to turn around immediately so I can speak to someone about this atrocity. 

When we arrived back to the hospital, there wasn't a soul in sight. The front door opened to the lobby where I attempted to find a manager from the hospital, but to no avail. By this time, I was seeing red. I marched back to the car, opened a notebook, and wrote a little letter to the Loogie Valet, including a few of my favorite explicit adjectives and such. I then proceeded to go back into the entryway of the hospital, tainted sweet tea in hand, and dump the contents of the cup all over the neatly stacked directional signs and main podium for the Valet Parking, leaving the note in the sticky mess.  

I'm blaming the narcotics for my behavior, but I certainly won't apologize for doing it.  I decided right then and there that I no longer am going to allow people to walk all over me, and do mean things for the sake of being assholes.  Those days are no more.

After getting 20 years worth of anger out of my system, I had a very nice evening in with friends. My sister, brother-in-law, his brother, his friend, my sister's best friend and along with my hubby and I had a little get together drinking wine and playing beer pong. And last but not least, as I was driving home, I was backing into my sister's driveway, and clipped her neighbor's vehicle, leaving some big gashes down the rear side of my car. What a perfect ending to a rainy day, huh?

Carb Crazy

My initial appointment is over and done with, and I'm more excited about this surgery than I thought. The appointment itself was a little wonky and long and overdrawn and BORING, but the meeting with the doctor was the best part without a doubt.  I'm so confident in Saint Joe's. I know I'm making the right choice. 

The appointment was long and drawn out, due mostly to the extensively lengthy mental examination, which took the greater part of three (!) hours.  When that was over with, I got my triage done and was sitting in the exam room talking to firstly, my exercise physiologist, then my nutrition counselor, and finally, my internal medicine provider.  He assured me that my age is a huge benefit for me getting the Roux-en-Y bypass, and that with my years of trying to lose weight on my own, if I have my doctor sign off for me in a timely manner, I should be able to have the operation done in mid-July. I was under the impression that I would have a 6 month grace period that I would have to wait for for my insurance to pick it up, but what a nice surprise!

In other news, I got registered for my Fall semester at Union after a wait of nearly 6 months.  I'm so glad to be going there. They are so interested in you on a personal level in the administration office, that I can hardly wait to see what my professors are like. What a nice group of people. They really run the college like one should be ran. As a business that is in turn aiding the person getting educated there, rather than a daycare that gives you a degree after 4 years of impersonal education. Also, I finally declared my major! Elementary Education with an emphasis in English and Fine Arts. It has been a long road, but I think I'm finally going to be satisfied with my career choice. For my Master's Program, I'm looking at a Library Science degree. I'd love to be a librarian eventually. Between summers, I may even lend my time off volunteering at the local public library just to gain some experience in the field to be better prepared.

Finally, in order to complete my surgery, I am required to undergo a low-carbohydrate based diet until surgery day. And let me tell you, readers, it is difficult. Especially for a gal like me who is totally in love with simple carbs. I'm tired all the time, cranky, and I'm finding it increasingly difficult to sleep, but on the bright side, I get to eat as much turkey bacon as I can handle every morning! Ha ha! It is already turning into a difficult road, but in the end I know it is going to be worth it all in the end.  I'm so excited I can hardly contain my joy.